Giving Thanks

melindas — Fri, 25 Nov 2016 22:46:35 +0000

It is easy to forget, in the busyness of the holiday season, that Thanksgiving is about so much more than eating until we’re stuffed, spending hours doing dishes, and then collapsing on the couch. Last night we hosted twenty of my husband’s relatives, whom I happen to really like. We had people ranging in age from 84 years old to 6 months old, and the four older kids (ranging from 11-13 years old) put on a variation of a show that they have been putting on since they were little tiny kids, each year adding in the younger kids and making the dances and skits harder. Since my son is the only boy in that group of kids, one year the girls decided to dress him up in girls clothes, which he didn’t mind since he was little. Sometimes there are magic tricks and sometimes singing, like when my son sang “Down On the Corner” in a Cajan accent in his sports coat and tie, with all his front teeth missing since he was only six. Most years the show involves dancing and jokes. This year, we had a 2 year-old and a baby watching the show, getting ideas for when they are old enough. To me, that’s what the holidays are about: silly rituals, a pack of kids, and all generations celebrating together.

I’m concerned, however, that some of us are missing the point. Retailers have decided to cash in earlier every year, so that Black Friday now begins on Thanksgiving. I was at the gym this morning watching the news, and there are already stories of people getting hurt in stores, fighting over discount items. One shopper even shot and killed another shopper over a coveted parking spot. Our family decided long ago that we would boycott Black Friday, since the holidays should not be about shopping; they should be about family and twinkling lights and festivals and rituals and whatever religion you believe in. What would the pilgrims think of our commercialism taking over what was supposed to be a reverent reference to them? I admire the pilgrims for their survival skills through brutal hardships. They weren’t just survivors, though. They were religious and strived to be good.

I recently read about a Muslim community who bought land a few years ago across from a church in Memphis Tennessee. The Christian community was so upset, that many people threatened to leave the congregation. The pastor, however, decided to pray about it, and realized that the best way to show their religion was to welcome the community with open arms, including letting the Muslims worship in their church the entire month of Ramadan, since their building hadn’t been finished yet. The two communities now do clothing drives and bake sales side by side and hold each other up, as friends and partners.

As we begin this holiday season, let us remember to give thanks for all of our blessings and remember those who are without, particularly the people in war-torn countries, and those who have no homes or friends or hope. One of the students at my daughter’s school is battling cancer right now, thousands of miles away from home, because Boston Children’s Hospital has the best care there is. He just found a new tumor on his leg. If you believe in prayer, please pray for Pablo. My daughter has learned so much by being friends with him.

To find your world stage, remember that the world extends so much beyond our tiny lives. And yet, we are so needed in the world. Now that the leftovers are put away and the guests have gone home, it’s time to roll up our sleeves and get to work. The world is waiting.

I took this shot in a local cemetery that has beautiful trees.

Love Is the Answer

melindas — Fri, 17 Jun 2016 19:22:54 +0000

When I think about the recent shooting at the gay club in Orlando, all I can think of is how often we get it wrong in understanding violence in our country. Even though it’s true that gay people were targeted this time, three years ago it was school children in Newtown, and 20 years ago it was high schoolers at Columbine. In reality, it doesn’t matter who was in the club– they happened to be largely gay hispanics, but the fact is that they were people laughing and having a good time, and then shot down for no reason. It doesn’t matter who the gunman was– he was Muslim and originally from Afghanistan. But the reality is that he was mentally imbalanced and had easy access to guns, just like the killer at Newtown and the killers at Columbine, all of whom were white.

It scares me that we live in a country that might elect a man who wants to build a wall and shun all Muslims. Do we not remember our history, the fact that people of Japanese descent were imprisoned here in our country during World War II even though they were American? Or the Jews rounded up in Europe to be killed just because of their religion?

It seems almost trivial to think about finding your passion and living it when so much of the world seems at war with each other, and when terrorist attacks have become so commonplace that we barely notice anymore. And yet, finding your world stage is essential for the world, because if you’re doing your life’s work, then you radiate a joy that can’t help but create a light for so much darkness. We need more people standing up for what they believe in and living a life committed to helping the world as an antidote to hate.

I wrote a song once in which the lyric was: Love is the answer/Joy is the way/To finding meaning/In every day. I wrote it as a wedding song, but really it’s more apt as a counter to the world’s violence. The more we can live with love as the answer to any problem and choose joy on our path, the more meaning we will find, since there is no meaning in violence and there is no meaning in watching the Kardashians or trying to keep up with the Joneses. The meaning comes from being true to ourselves and stepping up on our world stage so that we may be a light for others.

Love is the answer. Now go prove it.

Muslim – World Stage Coaching

Giving Thanks

Love Is the Answer